Daily Productive Sharing 1236 - Get Curious While Listening

Dr Selfie -

One helpful tip per day:)

Ben Kuhn shares his advice on how to listen to others more effectively:

  1. When he listens best, it’s usually because he feels a strong sense of curiosity—he’s trying to build a detailed, accurate understanding of what’s really happening in the other person’s mind.
  2. In reality, there are often many surprising hidden details, and these details are critical for finding the root of a problem or the best solution.
  3. If you miss these details, you’ll likely give bad advice based on wrong assumptions, forcing the other person to waste effort correcting you.
  4. Often, the reason your advice is bad is that you didn’t truly listen, and the reason you didn’t truly listen is that you lacked enough curiosity.
  5. Rephrasing the other person’s thoughts in your own words not only shows them you’ve fully understood but also helps you both build a shared language for deeper discussion.
  6. Behind every sentence you hear, there are layers of hidden details. Try to absorb and internalize as much of them as you can.

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如何更好地倾听别人？Ben Kuhn 认为我们要保持好奇，找出背后的细节：

  1. 当我最能有效倾听别人时，通常是因为我充满了强烈的好奇心——我试图建立一个细致、精准的理解，弄清楚他们脑海中真正发生了什么。
  2. 事实证明，现实中隐藏着大量令人惊讶的细节，而这些细节在找出根本问题或最佳解决方案时，往往非常重要。
  3. 如果忽略了这些细节，我最终会基于错误的假设给出糟糕的建议，而对方则不得不花很多精力反驳我、纠正我的错误理解。
  4. 实际情况很可能是：你的建议之所以不好，是因为你没有真正倾听，而你之所以没有真正倾听，是因为你缺乏足够的好奇心。
  5. 把对方的想法用自己的话复述出来，既能向他们展示你已经完全理解了，也能帮助你们建立一套共同的语言来继续深入讨论。
  6. 你听到的每一句话背后，都藏着大量细节。尽可能地去吸收和内化这些细节。

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